Tis Monday again… Have you noticed.? Marvellous. Back to being a little slower at work thankfully. But I wish it would rain PROPERLY. Drizzle just makes me think of Snoop Doggy Dogg all the time. Dammit.
What a Grand Prix that was.! My word. Rain always makes things weird but seeing six cars including The Ham sitting in the gravel trap at turn one was very odd… seeing Markus Winkelhock leading the field in his Spyker was possibly the least expected sighting of the year.!!! Brilliant racing despite the bad call from Maclaren which put Lewis a lap down again. Oh well. Hungary next, where it rained last year… but won’t this time round and so a procession it will be.!
Great time Saturday night. Notable points include me and Brownie pouring our drinks over each other, dancing to Umbrella (I know, I am very ashamed of myself) and being told some “celebrities” from Musicool (no I don’t know either) were in Hobbits… no one famous… just a few pointless unknowns.
Apparently most of the Midlands is under water. Wonder if it will come out cleaner.? And as they have been suggesting that there would be torrential rain since last week, why did it take so long to get the flood gates sorted…. and why did they end up being stuck on a lorry in the traffic jams in the first place.?!?!? The Environment Agency… working for you.
Did notice that First Great Western had proclaimed “Our trains are experiencing severe delays”. Nothing to do with the weather, just a general statement.
NEWS SHORTS
Georgie W Bush has had five suspicious lumps taken out of his arse… three were identified as Tony Blair, Dick Cheney and Jack Straw.
UK scientists have said they are very close to creating a drug to prevent Alzheimer’s disease. Trouble is they cannot remember where they left the formula. A certain Mr Beaton is very interested in the medicine to help him remember the stuff he says when drinking (this week specifically “You shouldn’t have eaten so much, you fat cow” to a pregnant friend. Don’t worry was in good humour and she giggled as well).
Tony Blair has arrived in Israel to speak to Jordan. Must be those boobs that attracted him.
There has been an apparent rise in the use of animals in scientific research. It amazes me how they can train a mouse to hold a test tube let alone get a degree in inorganic chemistry in the first place.!
Global warming is to blame for all the flooding in the Midlands… so Global watering then.?
Paul Whitehouse is being called as a witness in the “Chris Langham does kids” (allegedly) court battle. Wonder if he will turn up as the 13th Duke of Wybourne (”Me, in a fourteen year old’s bedroom.? At 3am.? What-o.!”).
And finally, the amount of anti-depressants being perscribed to under 16’s has gone up by 400% in the last ten years. The easiest ways to spot if your child is depressed are listed below…
1, Your baby doesn’t stop crying even when the Teletubbies finally get their “Tubby-Tustard”.
2, Toddlers may try slashing wrists using those plastic scissors you usually get with children’s art packs.
3, If you find your eight year old sitting watching MCR on Scuzz, weeping softly and trying to wipe his hair into an eye covering fringe, turn off the TV.
Slip you a length later then.?