I am in pain. A simple enough thing to type but my view of the screen is being distorted by the size of my nose and my slightly drugged up mind. There by hangs a tale…. (I apologise now for the joke at the end)
We went out last night. Myself, Hwang and Rich. Arrived in Hobbits to the usual slightly iffy metal band (who were Italian but Hwang was trying to talk to them in quite fluent German). Had a few drinks and a lovely hug with, well lets call her brownie. Brownie is soft and squidgy and smells nice, need I say more, apart from she has a bloke, grrrrrr. Oh and plus she reminds me vividly of a certain lady called Hayley who caused me a lot of pain and heartache years ago. Talk about life repeating itself dammit.
Well anyway, I was having a thoroughly nice time, Blondie had appeared and then told me she was seeing someone… someone who turned out to be called Rebecca (no I didn’t see it coming either) and annoyingly Blondie looked even nicer last night than she did last time… heyho.
Then came the slight downer…
While dancing with my eyes closed (which I actually have to consiously think about keeping open when I have had a couple), Keith’s head and my nose decided to occupy the same air space at the exact same millisecond as each other. I saw a blinding flash and went ooooow a lot, Keith took one look at me and dragged me by the hand, with Blondie in tow, out the door. I spent about 5 minutes dripping blood onto the pavement while various cloths and tissues were fetched. Blondie was very sweet and wiped my face and hands clean while I held my throbbing nose twixt fingers and repeatedly uttered the word “fuck” under my breath. Keith, bless him, kept apologising for doing it, not that it was his fault and he bought me a drink to say sorry, awwwwww. The bleeding stopped and we all went back to dancing.
When Hobbits closed we stood outside for a while, Dave took a piccy of me with my blood and some mad guy said he had found a tooth in the puddle.!! Cue look of horror from me and then bemusement as I found I still had all mine. Then I pointed out it was a peanut that the bouncer had been eating while I was bleeding.
I currently am sporting a nice line in big noses, a bruised lip and a cut on my tongue for my troubles.
So you see, my Friday night wasn’t all that boring. Will it be the same next week.???
Who nose.?
Muppet!